Well I'm not celebrating any holiday that I don't get work off for. NO WAY!
I'm Italian. The Irish half of me is debatable and quite possibly Scottish. I don't like beer. It tastes like what I can only imagine must be pee.
I'm wearing blue today. No green. I'm not even going to pick my nose. Though, I might just give myself a nosebleed because blood is Red... Which is the opposite of green.
I'm working today. I don't get to make a fool of myself at the local pub. I don't even have the opportunity to buy a Shamrock Shake from McDonalds (Which, given the "Mc" in the name, I will not be eating at either this evening).
But Mark, why not just wait till' five and go celebrate? Because by five all the drunk idiots that also had to work today will be out and about flooding the streets of Portsmouth and making my life miserable! I'm probably going to be up all night listening to the frat boys next door act exactly you'd expect them to act. Fortunately for me, they're probably going to flunk out of school and die in an alley way buying crack.
...
And this makes me happy. Because I'm working, and they're drinking.
~ Mark
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